What do you do when you’re feeling like someone is judging you? What if this person doesn’t even know you well enough to make an accurate judgment?
First I must ask the question: What is Judgment? Judgment is defined as…
…the process of forming an opinion or evaluation by discerning and comparing.
When someone makes a judgment, they are making an opinion based off of the information given to them. Like a judge makes a decision over a court case, they can only do so based off of what they know, see, experience, etc.
When someone has an opinion about you, or what you have done, that opinion has been derived from a vast amount of information. Some of which may be directly related to their experience with you, while others may be completely unrelated to you at all. We each see life through a different set of experiences and learned information.
Hopefully, as Christians, we are beginning to see life from a more biblical point of view, but we all have our own areas of growth.
So what *I* try to do when I’m feeling judged or someone has an opinion about me that might “rub me a little wrong” is stop and think about the very things I posted about here.
First you have to determine if what these other people are saying is true.
If all of it is true and you’re okay with that, then so what about their opinion? They’re entitled to it. It’s theirs. Let them have it.
However, if any part of what you’ve heard is true and you don’t like that it’s true, what are you going to do to change it — or would you rather just accept it for what it is?
What you do with the information gained is completely up to you.
Then again, there’s another possibility: Maybe what is being said is completely false, made up lies. In which I suggest you simply move on. You may want to correct the information, but in most situations, the attempt to do so is simply going to appear as an attempt to hide something.
Rely on the truth. Know who you are and what you stand for.
The truth is incontrovertible. Malice may attack it, ignorance may deride it, but in the end, there it is. (Winston Churchill)
Stand up. Move forward. And don’t look back.
Overall, I think we look at judgement entirely wrong. Anytime we form an opinion, we are making a judgment. Statements such as:
- That couch has four legs.
- That couch is blue with yellow flowers.
- That couch is old and has seen a lot of behinds.
… are all judgments. We make judgments every single day. It doesn’t mean those judgments are necessarily right or wrong. It just is what it is. If we take others’ opinions and allow them to override our own way of thinking, that’s when we have internal conflict.
Measure the standard and grow where you need to. Otherwise, give back what is not yours.
What do you think? How have you overcome the urge to be held back by other people’s judgments of you and your decisions? Tell us in the comments!